Last Leaf Designs | Web Designer » Two Pregnancies, One Decision

These days are so stressful for me! For starters, the client I have right now seems like a pregnant woman to me - today he wants one thing, then the next he wants another and I’m all “Make up your mind already!” It’s really frustrating, and all I want is for me to be a regular employee and I won’t be one if I couldn’t make this “psycho client” happy (pray that I won’t get fired because of that hehe). Argh… I’m getting thinner and I don’t like it because a thin face doesn’t suit me. I’d rather have a quite plump face than be Hillary Duff thin, I might even scare me if that happens.

Then, two of my friends got pregnant. The first one was aborted and the other one, well she said it was miscarried… I don’t know though, I have a bad feeling about it.

I am totally bummed, I don’t like what’s happening to my friends right now.

You really wouldn’t know what you’d do or feel in a situation unless you’re in it.

I am a pro-life, but then I couldn’t get mad at my friend for terminating her pregnancy, when I got the news that she really got through with it I was shocked. I never thought any one of us could ever be capable of such thing. I thought I’d get mad at her for doing so, but still the first thing I asked her was, “How are you feeling?” I felt so sad that I’d never be able to hold her baby, but I felt sad and sorry about her loss too.

After what happened, she got so sick and was depressed for weeks and it tormented me in a way because I couldn’t go to her (darn schedule). After this event, I realized one thing. I am now officially afraid of sex. Why?

1. I might get pregnant.
2. I will be kicked out of the house if I did get pregnant.
3. I might have rash decisions with dire consequences.
4. Many people have already said it, it’s painful.
5. I will be obliged to get married.
6. I might get too attached since I have read somewhere that women get to be like that after they did “it”

But then again, I guess it’s a case to case basis since not everyone I know got pregnant when they started having sex, some people get sexually transmitted diseases. Wait, I think that’s worse, add that to my list.

1. I might get sexually transmitted disease. I know it depends on your partner, but who knows what will happen?!

Hmm… is that all? I guess so. So, as I was saying. I am now officially afraid of sex and commitment and am now ready to embrace the looming fact that I am heading towards a life of single-blessedness.

P.S. Mae, stop talking to yourself. I’m getting afraid of you.